fairfield residential and other birthday stuff

thanks to fairfield residential for the birthday presents got off them today.

got a awesome spongebob squarepants cake-still not had it yet,have had a cold coming on and its gotten really bad since this evening.
got a bottle of lynx deodorant-not been able to afford it for a long time.
got packet of yorkshire tea; which for those outside the uk is an expensive strong type of english tea bag from yorkshire-its proper tea none of that weak shit,got money,all sorts of bits-thanks very much to the exact people who put this together and gave the money for it,am not allowed to say names on here because am dragged into the office and lectured about it-well they havent done that here yet because was left near traumatised by the last time it happened when was in the other service,then again that was only for using the first letters of each name but enough about the past.

also want to say thanks to 'the rain' for ordering em a big pack of ribenas on the house shopping list,its very apreciated although its nothing to do with birthday,its something had found in the cubord when got back from the sisters today.




this is the cockrel chicken plushy/teddy had got from mum/dad-

it looks a lot better for real/not in photo and am going to try and get all of the chicken range,its from a brand called hansa,they do lots of animal toys and plushys and woud recommend looking it up got mine from amazon.


this is the tshirt got off sister-

am more a fan of cockrels because they act like theyre well hard in front of their girls and do a funny neck puffing routine when fighting other males but they are big softies around their human mum,for proof of that,this was tito this week walking around in a makeshift baby wrap;he didnt want to get out as it was warming him up,plus he was getting porridge hand fed to him.

to be fair to him actualy,temple; the hen of mine who lives in the coop with tito and lorna managed to escape out of a gap whilst we were giving both coops their daily porridge plus free ranging the other group of chickens-she only wanted some grass but she had three giant cochin cockrels chasing her around the garden-tito was stuck in his coop and was going fucking mental at them for touching his bird.
the sis says he is 'a good pimp to his girls',people have offered to buy him to, pfftt no chance.

autism taboos: smearing

smearing is a habit many of us on the severe or profound spectrums of autism have done or still do but very few people understand or want to tolerate it.

many of us have been punished for smearing which in some peoples cases leads to increase in smearing because they value all attention-negative and positive as the same,for some of us it leads to confusion and hurt because we do not understand why it is wrong.

some people smear purely because it is a way to direct peoples attention away from other things directly onto them,whereas other people smear because they do not understand how to express what is in them;they do not understand how they feel in a way that can be translated to themselves and others-am one of them.

am not a smearer of shit however,there was a few times had done it when young but am very intolerant of the smell of shit; have always felt throw up come up when around the smell of it.
the things have always smeared on walls and self are snot/spit and blood.

in own case it is a desperate form of communication;both for self and to the outside of self,and also a sensory seeking issue,though people always assume am smearing spit/cough up when its because am not able to understand what to do with it regardless how often people have a go.
non autistic people take their ability to understand what is going on inside them,their ability to translate their thinking [mine is purely image based so takes a lot of time and processing effort to translate into language] and communication for granted.

the incontinence nurse of mine has helped other autistics with smearing before by managing to replace body fluids with moisturising cream but for some of us that woud be a impossible concept-they are not the same thing so do not work in place of.

one of the worst stereotypes have seen of smearers is that we are dirty, in particular shit [formal-faeces] smearers,every single smearer have ever and still know are cleaner than neurotypical people,they take at least one bath a day; some people more than one bath and in own case am constantly wiping hands with baby wipes.

yet another birthday

that day that brings presents and enough redbull and chocolate till pukeup arrived,birthday.
however,have spent the last year being told by family am twentynine and that am going to be firty this year so its rather confusing to be told today by sis and bro in law am not thirty,am twenty nine-aparently mum hadnt a clue what age am already though she knows sisters.

have had a very good day which makes the week have had bearable.

am very greatful to anyone that recieve cards and/or presents,they mean a lot to self [cards to] and have kept everyone have ever goten unless someone else through them out.

on tuesday,was visited by old friends of mine- two of them the old support staff of mine and one of them a manager had known well from the national autistic society,they had all got em through some very difficult times prior to being moved into fairfield residential.
was bought a awesome egg thing for present and a big pack of mars bars- very useful considering have never got money to buy things like that,though aldis titans are a close alternative!!
they had never seen the chickens of mine as they were told not to visit at the beginning of moving in to allow em to understand and get used to the new place,they were so chuffed by the chickens they got loads of photos of them and uploaded them straight on their facebooks.

then all but one staff got on our huge trampoline-this was at night time in pitch black it was awesome.

came to stay at sisters today for birthday and we picked up a burger king on the way-got a double xl burger with nothing on it; no crap and no cheese, and a large coke,also got a awesome tshirt with a big chicken on it,she also made the best triple chocolate cookies that no money can buy.

off mum and dad got a very realistic chicken plushy/teddy,a t shirt and some jogging pants,some money and mum made a very nice cake we all had some tonight.
might get a starbucks tomorow on the way home.


overall,one year older,no wiser,heres to a next fuckin year.

wheelchair

am finaly one step closer to being able to access what most people take for granted.

the autism and epilepsy of mine are so restrictive in being able to just take a stroll outside the building and in our local community,will lose all connections and drop to the floor into severe sensory overload, and if have not gone unconcious at that point-will be in 'head bang and self punch/bite/hit out' mode.
-will often have seizures during it to,and am always paralysed from the waist down once come around which can last for over a day in full [a side effect known as todds paralyisis].

the manager who we used to have was an absolute dick head in some ways, he never understood how it affected life so much by not having a wheelchair.
he said if was given a wheelchair woud only want to use it all the time once have gotten used to it-he was projecting how he woud react onto em,em have many disability aids that use when need them but will not use them when not needed-seriously what sort of person woud choose to use a wheelchair when they dont need it;when they woud be disabling themselves even more given the access issues and physical problems that comes with sitting down in one position for so long?

have wrote about it before but there has been so many times where,thanks to the previous managers and the manager we used to have,after seizures or sensory overload in parks was paralysed on the ground and using hands and wrists had to drag self along the sharp stones on the ground for miles to get back to where the car was,not only is it exhausting,the back of hands and wrists were always shredded and bloody and clothes were soaking from the ground being wet, we were constantly being stopped by passerbys to ask if we had a problem!
it is so offensive and hypocritical that the manager of that home actualy let two residents get wheelchairs because they got a bit tired when they were out in the community for a while.

mum/dad said they may be able to buy it if its at a lower price,but because am not able to hold body up nor hold head up after a seizure or sensory overload will need a crelling or some other X/H type harness and head rest added and theyre pretty expensive addons.
it takes a very long time to get an asessment for a wheelchair voucher on the NHS [and that is assuming meet the criteria] so am going to hopefuly have a cheap one for now and get one fitted for needs via the NHS at some point.