Wednesday, 28 April 2010

Self injury [cutting] outside of mental health

One of the things that people never see as being anything other than a part of mental health/illness,is cutting as self injury.

it doesn't matter how much it is explained,it is always seen as a MH thing.

in own case,am a cutter-had started doing it in some form-in infant school using finger nails to dig out flesh,it moved to using other tools late/as an adult due to not realising knives,razor blades,stones,glass etc can be used for anything but what they were made for until was living with someone who did it to.

the biggest causes behind it are sensory seeking,and pressure due to not being able to feel most types of pain [especially outer],to communicate when cannot communicate in any other form,and sensory and information overload.

am lucky in that family and staff always hide as many things that coud be used for cutting as possible,but when desperate have turned to using things they dont like to remove [PECS],and other things they never thought coud be used,plus when am actually desperate woud never be saying am lucky,woud be seeing it as people being cruel for not giving those things to cut with.

will only ever cut on left side out of a lifetime routine,and currently its looking like both arm and leg are heavily tattooed....well...if squint a bit...from a distance.

usually have to wear a thick tubigrip bandage which covers arm [the leg one doesnt work] and hand,to make cutting harder and help the scars heal,but have been getting fed up with it just sticking to scars and reopening them every night as well as when feeling desperate to cut,because am not able to transfer it to other places like other people,so leave it off now.
coudnt care less if people see them-it doesnt mean anything to self,and besides,might give them something else to rant about and make fun of other than their jeremy kyle marathons on daytime tv.

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